I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
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