i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Randomize
