he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Houston, we have a squirter
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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