I skipped work to stalk him.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
