Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize