im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Everclear isn't food dammit
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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