Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
