so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Pants are for mortals
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
