you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
