Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
