I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
