You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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