At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
this boner is exhausting
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
