you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
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