He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
NoShamevember. You game?
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Randomize
