I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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