Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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