so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Are we still banned from the library?
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
