I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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