But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
only you would photoshop your dick
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
