you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
