She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
