So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
