are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Randomize
