I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
