Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Randomize
