He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
