xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
