he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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