she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
