i just wanna soil my oats bro
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
