i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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