i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize