omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
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