I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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