Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Randomize
