I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Randomize
