Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
