I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
