So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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