Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
