So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
It was like getting head from an anaconda
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
