He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
