She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
