i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize