He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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