I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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