im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
