I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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