I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
