i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
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