eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
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